Rules for both “Date Match” and “Sex Match”:

1. To set your wants in another person, hover over “Date Match” or “Sex Match” and click “Match Settings.” Check which qualities or interests you desire in a match. These stay as your defaults choices until you change them.

2. Since the country list is very long, check “Uncheck All” before you check your country/countries in case you accidentally checked other countries. Then check off your country/countries, and if you are in the USA enter your zip code and the amount of miles to seek (the maximum is 99 miles; note that you cannot put in miles for countries other than the USA). This is important to see who is out there for you.

Of course, if you are visiting another country, you can check only that one, to see who you might visit from GayTies over there.

3. Now, hover again over “Date Match” or “Sex Match,” and this time click on “Run Match Maker.” If you get too few results, you can broaden them by being less picky.

Here are the inner workings of the match system (points 4 to 6):

4. Both “Date Match” and “Sex Match” have many fields which you can try to match or just ignore, such as: “He’s in this country,” “His body type,” “His relationship status,” “His erotic interest,” “Endowment,” and so on. So the first rule is to leave unchecked any field that is unimportant. You can make sure of this by checking the “Uncheck” box for the fields you don’t want checked.

5. What to consider when completing the match forms: in fields that are important to you, select multiple answers to achieve the longest list of possible matches. You can always weed out the unacceptable ones later. For example, let’s say you are into a guy who is “fit.” Do not just check “fit”! Many, many guys who are fit refer to themselves as “average,” “muscular,” or even “slender.”

Yes, if someone wants to be big and muscular, but he is only “fit,” he may well have marked himself as “slender.” You might think he is trim and fit, but he sees himself as slender. Therefore, you can check the description you want, but also check other descriptions that may be considered close to that one. People use words differently.

Another example: you want to connect with a nonsmoker. So for “smoking” you check “No.” However, many polite smokers today do not want to smoke when they are with nonsmokers. Or, if they knew their habit bothered someone they cared about, they might just quit. If I wanted a nonsmoker, I’d check “No,” “Socially,” “Quitting,” and “Not around nonsmokers.” I mean, Darling, if you were just an occasional smoker and had the hots for a guy who didn’t want to be around smoke, …wouldn’t you quit for him?

So be open to the many choices that are near your ideal.

Last example: Endowment. People think that most men prefer huge dicks. No, no, no, … not according the many surveys in gay magazines, most men (certainly not all) actually prefer average dicks, not only for physical reasons, but also for psychological ones. As for cut and uncut, men seemed split.

The other kicker in here is that many men who are “cut” are only semi-cut: they have a little foreskin, but not much. Did you know that half these men call themselves “cut,” and half of them call themselves “uncut”? Plus, some guys call a 7 inch dick average, some call it large, and a few call it small. So again, people use words differently. Our suggestion is to leave this field blank if possible, or, if you want a small to average dick, check everything but “Huge,” and if you want an average to large dick, check everything except “Small.”

6. What about guys in cyber-sex. This one is easy.

a. Go to “Sex Match,” then “Match Settings,” and under “His interests on GayTies,” check “Cyber/chat buddies” only.

b. Under “His roles,” check “Top” or “Bottom,” and be sure to always check “Versatile.” (Only if this is important to you in your fantasy; otherwise, leave blank)

c. Under “His erotic interest,” check 1 to 5 erotic interests you seek to experience (cyber-wise) and want to work into your beat-off session. NOTE: do not check off a country or anything under “Smoking,” “Status,” etc., because none of those things matter in a cyber-sex chat experience.

d. Now go to “Sex Match” and select “Run Match Maker.”

1. How about nonsexual gay chat? Also easy.

a. Go to “Date Match,” then “Match Settings,” and only check “non-sexual friends” (under “His interests on GayTies”).

b. Under “His lifestyle interests,” check 1 to 5 specific interests that you’d like to talk about. NOTE: do not check off a country or anything under “Smoking,” “Status,” etc., because none of those things matter in an online chat. Personal gay chat is between you and him, and it can exclude parts of reality.  

2. It's not just our word. According to Seattle Gay News, this is one og the best features. And here’s an important thing to remember: “His erotic interest” and “His lifestyle interests” both have around 30 choices, and you can select up to 5 that you’re seeking. However, a person will be tagged as your match as long as they match at least one of the interests you checked off. So if they match on only 1 interest or 5, they will be considered equal matches to you. A member who matches any one of your 5 interests will be considered a match.

a. For example, under “Date Match” you check off the following interests: movies, camping, swimming, theater, and travel. If a member checked ONLY movies, he will come up as your match (even though 4 other interests were not matched).

If you really want someone as a possible travel partner, check “Travel” only. Or if you want someone specifically into photography, check only “photography.”

b. To give “Sex Match” examples: if you have one specific sexual or erotic interest you want your partner to have—say, to give oral sex—check ONLY “Oral sex.” Or, if you want him to be into massages, check only “Massage.”